They always told me it was not going to be easy, but they sure didn't tell me it was going to be this frustrating. I have official been a senior for about three weeks and I have completely gone bonkers. As of now I have about a million thoughts a second being process by a brain that has been on stand by for at least two whole months. My computer has become my only friend; working with me for countless hours. Filing out scholarship, college, and SAT applications. My mind feels like it's been hijacked by the stress of college forms and scholarship applications and they aren't going to be giving it back any time soon.
My worst fear is that this is only a precursor of the more excruciating things to come as time mercilessly passes. For example IB tests that I was foolish enough to order a quadruple amount of. It seems now that the sweet little lies of summers, the false sense of time, has hit me like a ton of bricks. It's do or die time; what am I going to do? The distant fascinations of being a senior have become an immediate truth and it is not like I imagined them to be. Everything seems like it's under control but maybe I am just playing a cruel joke on myself. How I wish I had an agenda right now!
Hopefully I am just overreacting, I mean my sleep deprivation could be the cause of it. This lack of rest has become a trite symptom among my fellow classmates. I swear one of these days my body will revolt against me and I wouldn't blame it. Nonetheless, this is all for college and my future and is therefore all worth it; right? I mean everyday this strong belief on my actions is being slowly chipped away by my mortal fatigue. So this is how my first couple of weeks have been; fun no?
My worst fear is that this is only a precursor of the more excruciating things to come as time mercilessly passes. For example IB tests that I was foolish enough to order a quadruple amount of. It seems now that the sweet little lies of summers, the false sense of time, has hit me like a ton of bricks. It's do or die time; what am I going to do? The distant fascinations of being a senior have become an immediate truth and it is not like I imagined them to be. Everything seems like it's under control but maybe I am just playing a cruel joke on myself. How I wish I had an agenda right now!
Hopefully I am just overreacting, I mean my sleep deprivation could be the cause of it. This lack of rest has become a trite symptom among my fellow classmates. I swear one of these days my body will revolt against me and I wouldn't blame it. Nonetheless, this is all for college and my future and is therefore all worth it; right? I mean everyday this strong belief on my actions is being slowly chipped away by my mortal fatigue. So this is how my first couple of weeks have been; fun no?
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