Late Night Thoughts

I have always felt that my life has been nothing short of uneventful. I went day by day thinking that nothing was ever going to change. I felt so small and insignificant. I was only doing what seemed to be expected of me but nothing more in order to avoid problems. And I remember starting high school, it made me feel that feeling with fervid intensity. I remember walking down the halls and feeling invisible. People could see right past me, never giving me a second glance. I was so angry and fussy back then. Ha ha.

Of course, I don’t feel this way anymore. I have long since realized that no one is really putting me down on purpose and that my life isn’t as meaningless as I had once thought. I think that sometimes a big obstacle of ours is only seeing what we have left to do instead of seeing how much we have done. Stepping back and reflecting on what you’ve done can change a lot about your attitude towards things. I wasn’t stepping back to see my accomplishments, no matter how small they were. Sometimes our greatest accomplishment could be getting up from bed one morning. Sometimes our greatest accomplishment is to start the day.

Looking back at this year, I realize a lot of things have happened to me. I’ve earned a scholarship to study under amazing, respected artists who encourage us to pursue our goals. I've talked to important, talented artists who took the time to look at my drawings and demonstrate for us how they work themselves. And I've talked to one of my favorite voice actors from my favorite childhood cartoon because she had recognized some of my fanart. I'm just so grateful and happy that my hard work has brought me so much happiness. And I just can’t say my life is uneventful anymore. I mean, I would have never guessed that any of it would ever happen to me. And what makes me happier is that if it happened to me, then it could certainly happen to someone else. Someone else can have the chance of being just as happy.

Sometimes we should just step back and see how many great things have happened to us. How many obstacles we have overcome. How we have all accomplished something. How the world would have never been exactly the same without you.

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Gerome & Lily

Gerome: Tis it a fair day

Lily: Tis it fine

Gerome: I wonder how the sky is on the other side

Lily: Where?

Gerome: To where the lake falls beneath the sea. To where the sun awakes and sings. To where the flowers cascade through the open basin.

Lily: The words of which you speak what do they try to convey.

Gerome: My dearest Lily now that I have return from my long treacherous journey, from which danger lurks on thee grandest of scale. I have seen the stars across foreign skies. Now I have come to the lands of which brought my birth. I remember the day of which I first laid eyes on you.

Lily: Gerome. Of what message are you trying to let out.

Gerome: The sky was overcast..

Lily: Gerome no. Do not bring about these memories that long been in our past.Thy know of my engagement to Fredrick. I most honor it or my father will disown me of my family. Art thou know of this. The times between us should be left in its abyss.

Gerome: Lily please listen to me. When I peer into your sky I see all those things. The blue sapphires glisten amongst the moon. They reveal to me the world of which light constructs the realms. I long to come to stand before your presence to melt in your sweet delight. The infinite words I could speak of thy soul. The melodies the angels may sing for your graceful movements. Now Lily, thy soul has me at its mercy. Feel my heart. My heart that has beat in joy from the moment it saw thee that fair day in our youth. The vicious course of time has wounded me so. I present you with my entire possession. My love that holds me still. But please fairest Lily if thy were to reject my request take thy cleanest sword and drive it to my demise.

Lily: Gerome. Thee speaks of the most gracious words, but how can I leave my duties? How can I live with such dishonor?

Gerome: How can you allow me to burn before your presence? You once told me of the one true virtue: Love. Have you forgotten of such words?

Lily: Gerome......I..

Gerome: Lily. Now look deep into my eyes as I do to yours......What mystic beauty. Now tell me you don't love me as I do. Tell me your heart doesn't say my name with every beat.

Lily: ......Gerome...I..I do...I do love-

[Morning arose and the flames burst along the walls. The ground shattered open and consume them whole.]

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A Certain Type Of Stupidity

Have you ever had a crippling embarrassment over being incapable of possessing the same skills as others? Recently, I went to a college day that my art program was holding. Everyone seemed so much more experienced than I was. I felt embarrassed to even say that I had work to show. I had never experienced anything like it, and it made me wonder what made me feel this way and if others felt the same way at times. 
I realized that it happens a lot more frequently than we would like to admit. Truth is, in an ordinary school, the same thing is happening all the time. The school is constantly ranking us on our ability to follow their system of judgement. Follow instructions, do your work, get good grades, don’t do anything else. If you have a high gpa or if you have advanced classes, people often assume that you are a very intellectual person. I would try to stay away from that type of thinking since that means that those who don’t do the same aren’t very smart. Which is absolutely not the case. The people who are considered very smart are just able to follow or cheat the system into working in their favour. The others just aren’t interested or capable of this type of intellect. Which isn’t very fair since there’s many types of intellect, I think. Someone in a lower level class might possess a skill someone from a higher level class doesn’t. If we judge them solely by this skill, then we could say that the person from the higher level class is “stupid” in the area. We don’t often see it this way though, since we’re so used to a sole type of intellect, the one forced upon us by the educational system. We hold certain skills to have more value than others. But I leave you with one of my favorite quotes: “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”- Albert Einstein

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Time....

 Time. We see it through the actions that flow behind. It is curious how in one instance you are in the present and the other in the past. With this realization it is important that we cherish every moment of our lives. I am a high school senior and I know in just a few months all my friends will be going their separate ways. I've try to image being in the future and remembering this moment. I want to be able to recall a moment well spent.

It seems as though I slept one day as a fragile infant and awoke a grotesque beast. Its strange I see my hand everyday at it feel the same but I see the mirror and see it has changed. In a couple of waves my horns will extent and I will be dead.

"Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present"

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The Unkown

What makes this story so eery; why does this small package of words evoke such disturbing emotions. The answer is quite simple the unknown, what we don't know is what we are most terrified of. This concept could explain our obsession as a human race to explore and expand our knowledge; to reduce the dark regions of the unknown. It is quite funny that all our strives and achievements could all be motivated by fear. Does this devalue our inventions and discoveries; I don't think so. However it does provide us with fresh perspective on ourselves. What else is motivated by subtle entities like fear, the possibilities our beyond my ken, the horror they evoke.

-Pride&Ownership

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A Sea In A Turtle

The breeze of the open ocean caresses his face as he drives the boat. The boat is pulling a banana shaped floating device with tourists, or as he would call them “gringos”, on top of it. It was the middle of the day and he was weirdly tired. The sun burned in the horizon; making it uncomfortably hot, but this is what he expected living in Acapulco. He cut the trip short and headed back to the beach with the tourist.

He loved the beach, it was the only life he knew. He walked around the pier looking out into the ocean. He was scared; he had everything he wanted, but he was putting everything in jeopardy. He roamed around a bit more heading towards the aquarium; his aquarium.

This love of aquatic life was a hidden gem; uncovered by the opportunities brought forth by his unexpected successes. There was a whole variety of fishes and other aquatic mammals in the aquarium. He liked to just wander around and observe the animals. However one that really caught his attention was the turtle. He stared at the turtle; its size astonished him, Its movements so graceful. I stood there touching the glass with my face, eyes closed I was able to feel it move. He opened his eyes confronted with the eyes of the majestic beast from the sea. The turtle’s eyes looked into him, almost with compassion. That is when he saw it, the light of the ocean.

-Pride&Ownership

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A letter...

 Dear Enigma,

Time is short; I know this trite statement seems laughable to you because of its obvious truth. However these three simple words have never been more eminent before. Your death felt like an emotional band-aid being ripped away; leaving me with a scar. Time has only been a pacifier; I have yet to cope.

I' am yet to fully understand you. Your premature departure did not give us enough time. However through those short five years together we still connected rather powerfully, but yet I am left feeling dubious. You were always an enigma, so there is a possibility you purposely left me with such questions; why?  

-Pride&Ownership

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